- If you hear someone yell “on your left!” it usually means someone is about to pass on the left – be startled and stagger to the left into their path.
- Stop short for a walk break or to tie your shoelace – don’t look behind you first, and don’t pull off to the side.
- Walk 5 people-abreast.
- Start at the front, stand right in-front of someone wearing a single-digit race number.
- Spit without doing a shoulder check.
- Dart from the middle of the course to the water tables at the water stations.
- Stand at the water tables and drink. Better yet, take one sip of Gatorade, say you don’t like it and put it back; repeat.
- Butt into the elite porta-potty line. Steal the toilet paper roll.
- Count out loud and point as you pass people.
- Stop dead at the finish line.
- While waiting in line for food, talk about how big and disgusting your blisters are. Or better yet, butt in line. Take a ton of food – a bagel on each finger is a good start.
*Disclaimer: in case you couldn’t tell, this is tongue-in-cheek and is meant to make people chuckle who have who have seen these things in races. Doing such things may result in injuries, maybe not all accidental.
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